of former lovers usually leave deep wounds in the heart that prevent love from reopening and immersing itself in feelings.

In this case, you need to properly work through past experience, reconsider your life, cleanse yourself of the negative programs that are embedded in you.

The best thing you can do right now is to try to forgive the people who hurt you. Otherwise, grievances (even unconscious ones) will torment you constantly, dragging you deeper and deeper into the swamp, preventing you from moving on.

Remember all the painful moments from the past associated with men, and live them in your imagination again and again until the pain goes away. You can talk about it with another person, but without judgment, but as if you were an outside observer. It will be even better if you repeat your story not once or twice, but as many times as possible. You know, with repeated pronunciation, the emotional charge goes away from the problem. If this happens, we can assume that you have coped with the task and are now ready to consider a new relationship as a completely blank page, and not as a potential threat to your inner balance.

If ghosts from the past prevent you from creating a beautiful present, there is only one recommendation - contact a professional psychologist or deal with them in a group therapy format, this helps.

Ultimate frankness
The inability to speak frankly and without concealment with a man often leads to mistrust in a couple. Atчись искренне рассказывать о своих чувствах, переживаниях, страхах.

It's not as easy as it seems. Any conversation with a man is moving through a minefield. One awkward movement - and an explosion is heard, it closes and stops hearing you.

If something worries you, for example, your husband's late return home, it is absolutely contraindicated to be alone with your fears and suspicions. After all, playing silent, you will, firstly, grow an elephant out of a fly, scaring yourself with scary stories, and secondly, your half will clearly feel that something is wrong - as a result, alienation and chill will arise between you.

Try to sincerely talk with your man and talk about the fears that torment you.

The most important thing in this case is to refrain from accusations and claims. Just express what is sore - that you are afraid, that you are in pain, that your imagination draws unpleasant pictures, and so on. The leitmotif of the conversation should be a request for help, but not a complaint (remember the "mines"!). If you do everything right, you will most likely be convinced that his late returns from work have some other explanation than daily meetings with his mistress.

Atважение к личному пространству
Every person has the right to personal space. In this sense, it is necessary to observe the measure in an effort to make the relationship completely transparent and sincere. It is not at all necessary to demand from a man a daily report on how he spent the day, constantly asking who called him, and demanding a password from an account on a social network.

Never check his phone for messages from members of the opposite sex, who are likely to be just work colleagues, but in your fertile imagination will grow into something more. Such behavior will cause the opposite effect - your man will begin to change passwords, hide the phone, and you, in turn, will believe that he is hiding something.

Do not be afraid to trust and trust the person you have chosen as your life partner. Remember, your frankness generates a similar reaction from your partner, so do not demand sincerity from him, but start showing it yourself.

Harmonize the relationship with the father to develop the ability to trust
As we discussed above, it is the father who teaches the girl to take care of men. An ideal father should never insult his daughter, compare her with anyone else, especially not in her favor. He must show respect and admiration for her, look at her like a princess.

What to do if your relationship with your father was far from such an ideal? What to do if you didn’t have a father at all or he was far away? What to do if your mother spoke negatively and disrespectfully about your father or even about all men in general? This forms an unconscious program of contempt for men and unwillingness to be a wife and mother. Cultivates complexes in a woman, closes in her energy.

The easiest thing you can do yourself is to reprogram the part of your brain responsible for memories. Pay attention: our memories are not what actually happened, but how we interpreted the events of the past in reality. That is, the events of the past, passed through the filter of our attitude. It turns out that if we change our attitude, “reinterpret” the past, then our memories will change. And along with them, our beliefs associated with the object of memory will also change. To do this, you need to use your imagination as much as possible as a way to access the unconscious parts of the psyche.

To practice this skill, I offer you a simple and effective way to learn how to accept love from men.

In solitude, silence, better in bed before going to bed, mentally draw pictures of your past. Imagine yourself as a little girl next to your father. Imagine that he says words of encouragement to you, that you are beautiful, that you are the best girl in the world. Do not constrain yourself, give free rein to the imagination, this is very important. You need to feel your feelings from such a relationship with your father, how they affect your self-esteem, success, relationships with boys, and then with men. To enhance the effect, it would be good to watch movies that feature such a relationship between father and daughter. Imagine yourself in the place of the heroine. Feel a huge surge of trust in your father.

Do this exercise for 2-3 weeks and pay attention to the change in your feelings from communicating with men and how their reactions to you will change.

In conclusion about trust
There are many causes and consequences of distrust in the family. Let us recall the famous phrase of Leo Tolstoy: "All happy families are alike, each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way." Unfortunately, it can be said with all certainty that all families in which people do not trust each other are unhappy. And there is no common solution for all and cannot be. It remains only to work hard on yourself and hope that love and the natural desire for openness will be stronger than pride and fears.

Each time, faced with the fact that our expectations regarding a partner have not been met, we are faced with a choice - to go further towards us or return to the old circle of distrust. And only from us depends on which direction the step will be taken.

Real trust between a man and a woman is a hard work that requires daily investment and careful care. Collecting bit by bit, maintaining and developing trust in themselves and others, a man and a woman give a chance to their relationship to be happy and filled with true love.

Gratitude is the foundation of love

Very often, people turn to a psychologist who do not receive recognition and gratitude in the family for showing care, household chores, and so on. They complain about disrespect from their relatives, their unwillingness to help with the housework and simply a lack of attention.

Dear reader! Tell me, please, if right now I ask you to write a list of what your man once did for you, but now does not, how big will the list be? And if the list of what you would like a man to do for you, but he does not? Not because he can't, but for some other reason. How many items would be on your lists? Five, ten, maybe fifty?

I hope you already understand that the reason for the appearance of each item in this, literally speaking, black list is once unexpressed gratitude. If we "dig" a little deeper, we can make sure that the reason for the absence of a man as such often lies in the same "disease" - the inability to thank.

Gratitude is the foundation of love. It strengthens any relationship, especially relationships in the family, and it is precisely its lack that makes people unhappy in marriage, because everyone wants to know that he is not trying in vain, that his efforts will be appreciated. Gratitude is the most effective method of overcoming family crises!

Gratitude is the best psychological reinforcement, the best motivation for a man to perform certain actions more often (more on this below).

Gratitude is an expression of gratitude for any good deed, for done or donated. The emotion of gratitude is one of the most positive and pleasant. It arises in response to noble actions addressed to a person and concerns not only the relationship between a man and a woman. Grateful people are grateful to the world and life in general.

Abraham Maslow wrote about gratitude: “I found that many people do not appreciate the opportunity to satisfy needs and desires, and sometimes with disregard for an already satisfied need. Self-actualizing individuals are almost free from this delusion, which is the source of much human suffering. In other words, self-actualizing people know how to be “grateful.” They always remember the blessings bestowed upon them by life. For them, a miracle is always a miracle, even if they encounter it again and again. It is