following books, in which we will talk about what criteria to choose a partner that suits you, where and how to meet him, how to win him, and, having won, keep him and, if you have such a desire, bring it to the registry office and then how to cost the relationship so that your marriage is happy.

And in order for you to close this book with a smile, a few more of my trademark "ironicisms" about sex and gender relations.

***

Saying A, don't be B.

§

Whatбы целоваться как невинная девушка, нужно хорошенько потренироваться.

§

Lovely girls! If you decide to get married, think again, is it worth buying the whole pig for one sausage?

§

A man needs to be conquered by his appearance, not by his mind - men are often stupid, but very rarely they are blind.

§

Принцип: “IN постель — только после ЗАГСа”, - очень помогает ускорить процесс, когда мужчина не хочет жениться.

§

IN квартиру и в душу мужчины нужно внедряться постепенно.

§

As you get older, you get used to your age.

*

“He tried to get his tongue right up to my tonsils. No, this is not a kiss, but debauchery!”

*

Whatбы случайно не назвать в постели Мишу INитей, называйте всех мужчин “мой котик”.

§

A win-win way to win a man: say "No".

§

Don't believe when a man says his heart is broken. He means trouble with another body.

§

A woman is never as old as she looks.

*

The girl smelled of sin.

*

Only the impotent and the “gay” are indifferent to the fair sex. INам остается лишь выяснить, к какой группе относится мужчина, который не обращает на вас внимания.

§

A woman should dress in such a way that a man wants to undress her.

§

Whatбы быть удачливой, нужно быть зубастой. Whatбы быть зубастой, нужно иметь хорошего дантиста. Whatбы иметь хорошего дантиста — нужно быть женщиной.

§

The shorter the skirt, the easier it is to keep up with time.

§

Happiness has come ... on the corn.

*

No one is immune from an accidental meeting with the man of their dreams, so when you are going to work in the morning, do not forget about sexy lingerie.

§

May your every night be like your first wedding night!

*

Having caught a man, do not let him out of your arms.

§

"Small ladies' kit" - a condom, spare panties and a toothbrush.

“Big ladies' set” - in addition to the “small” one, there is also a vibrator - in case you are not lucky with your partner.

§

"The stains on my biography appeared solely from pure thoughts."

*

Soon sex will finally replace love.

*

Want отделаться от искушения, — уступи ему.

§

The director of the recording studio invited the aspiring singer to audition ... through the bed.

*

Men are suggestible. Whatбы он ценил и не возомнил, никогда не говорите в постели: “Ты был великолепен!”, но: “Я была великолепна!”

*

If you don't want a man to slip off on the beach, don't use suntan oil.

*

Random love affairs can have a venereal continuation.

*

Women, like sturgeon, do not have a second freshness.

*

“My husband was not at home, and the neighbor got to me. I gave him so much that he could not get up.”

*

She knew only one physical law - the law of friction.

*

The tattoo on the girl’s lower abdomen: “Do not touch with your hands!”

*

"He left a deep mark on me - pregnancy with twins."

*

Wife - daytime problems, mistress - nighttime joys.

*

Announcement: “You, the bastard, who deprived me of my virginity in the entrance of the house number 5 on Razgulyaev Street! Call 333-33-33”

*

“There was no rape! We fry “rubbed”, but on a friendly basis”.

*

The sun would sooner rise than his.

*

Deciding to ward off the admirer, she said that she castrated her cat herself.

*

“Honestly, I participated in group fucking.”

*

She slept with men only because she was afraid of all evil spirits.

*
INернувшись с вечеринки, ужинать не смогла — кусок в рот не лез после того, что там было.
Notes
1 You can read about such family tyrants in my book “I Chose the Wrong Man”. IN этой серии тоже будет книга о мужских типажах, с которыми лучше не связывать свою жизнь.

2 Anorgasmia - the absence of orgasm during sexual intercourse. Первичная аноргазмия — если женщина никогда не испытывала оргазма, вторичная аноргазмия — если раньше она была оргазмична, а с этим партнером или в связи с какими-то обстоятельствами перестала испытывать оргазм при интимной proximity.

3 If you want, you can write to the address of the publisher and tell about your innermost desires, but mention if you agree to become the heroine of my next book. INаше имя и прочая конкретика, разумеется, будут изменены, чтобы ваши знакомые по этим сведениям вас не узнали.

4 Sexual phobias are unreasonable obsessive states of fear, accompanied by high emotional tension and leading to the development of a defense reaction against difficulties in sexual life by refusing sexual contacts under any pretext, up to the complete cessation of intimate life.

5 Anorgasmia - difficulty or inability to achieve orgasm. Common condition in women. INыделяют три степени аноргазмии: 1. Оргазм не наступает, хотя половой акт и сопровождается в той или иной степени притяными ощущениями. 2. Sexual intercourse is indifferent, it does not cause sexual arousal or pleasant sensations. 3. Sexual intercourse is unpleasant, accompanied by painful sensations or causes disgust; woman tries to avoid sexual activity.

6 Exhibitionism - the desire to expose their genitals in the presence of strangers. This sexual perversion is most common in men (often accompanied by masturbation, but not strictly necessary; sometimes an exhibitionist's orgasm comes from a woman's fright or indignation), but also occurs in women.

7 You can learn about this from the books “Harmony of Sex” and “Sex with a Twist” published in this series.

8 You can learn more about this from the book Sex with a Twist.

9 The genitals are the sexual organs.

10 Themes and details for your own stories can be found in my books Harmonious Sex, Encyclopedia of the Sexual Mysteries of Man and Woman, or other literature listed at the end of this book.

11 With the permission of my patient, I recorded her confession on a dictaphone and I quote an excerpt at her request - she herself wanted me to write about her in one of her books, saying: “Let your readers, who, like me, have lived a long time without a manunderstand that happiness is possible any age".

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