вылазки в Aтлантик-Сити (до всей этой истории с ногами), чтобы просадить пять долларов в игровых автоматах, и два — три раза в год отправлялась навестить дочерей, подгадав свой визит к их отпуску, — на это время Trixie оставалась в the dog hotel at Dr. King's. In a way, those were carefree years.

Trixie всегда была рядом и, судя по снимкам, участвовала во всех самых важных событиях.

Миссис Джиаматти не забыла о том, как Trixie ждала ее дома, когда в больнице ей сказали о смерти Винсента. Heа помнила, как Trixie поддержала ее, когда Мария, а следом за ней и Тина, moved to the West. И никогда не забудет о том, какое терпение проявляла Trixie, когда ее хозяйка начала ходить после операции, как они гуляли вдвоем… A потом еще и лучшая подруга Грейс умерла от рака яичников.

The dog became an important part of her life, although Mrs. Giamatti belonged to a generation that frowned upon the tendency to humanize animals. О Trixie она говорила по-другому, не так, как о дочерях или внуках, и не пыталась угадать, о чем думает ее собака и думает ли она вообще.

Heа не разговаривала с Trixie, — по крайней мере, вслух — и не обсуждала с ней своих проблем.

Such reluctance to see a dog as a human did not mean that Mrs. Giamatti was not attached to her, was not afraid of losing her, or fed her scraps. Trixie ела два раза в день: по утрам она получала маленькую баночку консервированного корма, а перед сном ей в широком ассортименте предлагались блюда итальянской кухни в домашнем исполнении, — больше всего ей нравились спагетти.

By that time, I already understood that people love dogs for a variety of reasons: Rob adored his silent Cherokee as much as Sandra, the little Spitz, who gave her the opportunity to show maternal feelings. Mrs. Giamatti saw in her dog not a surrogate, replenishing her with the company of her loved ones, but a segment of her life path with which she was inextricably linked. Trixie была звеном в цепи: глядя на нее, миссис Джиаматти видела не только любимую собаку, но и своего мужа, детей, всю свою жизнь, представавшую перед ней в виде белого полотна, на котором картины прошлого сменяли друг друга.

Albert and Balcroft, who published their 1988 study on the impact of pets on the family, argue that among pet owners, relatively few people have lost their life partner. There are a number of reasons for this phenomenon: health problems, expenses, housing restrictions, the desire for independence. Montclair retirees have repeatedly told me they don't want a dog because it will almost certainly outlive them.

But for those lonely or orphaned people who already have a pet in their home, it can be an important source of love and friendship. “Being the object and source of love,” Albert and Balcroft note, “animals provide moral support to people who have lost family or living in an environment that is unable to provide such support.” As the researchers found, this skill is inherent in dogs.

Я прочитал этот отрывок Aнжеле Giamatti. She shook her head with a smile. Mrs. Giamatti had no idea what the authors meant by "moral support" and, apparently, did not intend to delve into these issues.

— С Trixie мне не так одиноко, благодаря ей я чувствую себя при деле, — пояснила она.

— Когда умер Винсент, мы остались с Trixie вдвоем, и отлично справлялись. She is a good companion and generally a good girl. Эй, Trixie? — Услышав призыв, Trixie с трудом поднялась с подстилки, подошла и, вильнув хвостом, села у ног миссис Giamatti. After sitting, she went back and lay down again. She looked unimportant.

Если бы не Trixie, миссис Джиаматти, вероятно, уступила бы просьбам дочерей: еще два года назад, когда ее проблемы со здоровьем усугубились, они настаивали на том, чтобы мать переехала в дом престарелых при католической церкви.

Mrs. Giamatti knew how Maria and Tina were worried about her loneliness. It was not easy for her either. Every day, any trifle was given to her more and more difficult. She understood that she would not be able to do without outside help for a long time, and even take care of the old dog. Но ей не хотелось уезжать из Монтклера, а о том, чтобы расстаться с Trixie, не было и речи. Mrs. Giamatti did not want to euthanize the dog before the hour struck.

I had heard many times from Montclair's veterinarians about the suffering that owners endure when they refuse to euthanize their dogs, but Mrs. Giamatti was a realist. Heа не хотела обрекать собаку на мучения и, если Trixie больше не сможет есть спагетти или ходить… Д-р Кинг обсудила с ней, что придется сделать, когда настанет время. “Sometimes true love is about not forcing a dog to live,” she said, quoting a veterinarian. She agreed with this statement.

However, I was not sure that Mrs. Giamatti understood how difficult it would be for her in the first weeks and even months.

Psychiatrists, as noted by Kenneth Keddy in the British Journal of Psychiatry, are well aware of people's reactions to the death of close friends or relatives, while the impact of the death of a pet on a person's mental health is still largely a blank spot. However, Caddy found that the death of a cat or dog is sometimes no less a shock than a severe disability or the loss of one's own home, and causes acute depressive states, agitation or other manifestations of mental disorders.

Thursday came. The morning promised to turn into a clear windy spring day. Миссис Джиаматти проснулась рано, оделась, постояла перед изображением Иисуса, склонив голову в молитве, затем поставила кофейник на плиту и стала собираться на прогулку с Trixie.

Bending down with difficulty, she fastened the leash. Trixie, которая послушно подошла на зов, стояла неподвижно, словно в оцепенении.

They walked slowly down the corridor, entered the elevator and went down to the first floor.

Дойдя до треугольного газона у парадного входа, Trixie остановилась и легла на землю.

"Let's go girl, we need to go." Let's try. — В последнее время, когда шел дождь или они с Trixie чувствовали себя особенно неважно, миссис Джиаматти расстилала на кухне газеты для Trixie. Наконец, Trixie пописала в кустиках и они вернулись к себе.

At half past seven, a taxi stopped at the entrance. The big old Chevy, brown and white, looked as beat-up as if it had been driven a million miles. Because of the dog, the shipping company increased the bill by five dollars. Выскочив из кабины, водитель поднялся в квартиру миссис Джиаматти и помог ей вынести картонную коробку с dog. Trixie не протестовала. Mrs. Giamatti climbed into the car with difficulty, now and then leaning heavily against the door or leaning on the driver's arm.

That day, Angela wore a dark brown dress and jacket, as she usually went to church, and - although her legs hurt mercilessly - brown pumps. She had a shopping bag in her hands.

A few minutes later, a taxi pulled up in front of Dr. King's clinic, and I followed them in my car. With the help of the driver, Mrs. Giamatti got out of the car and struggled up the steps. Коробку с Trixie нес помощник ветеринара. Добравшись до смотровой, миссис Джиаматти с Trixie тревожно переглянулись.

Dr. King examined the almost unconscious dog, looked into her eyes, listened to her heart, took her temperature. Having done all the necessary manipulations, she closed the door to talk with Mrs. Giamatti in private.

About ten minutes passed and the door opened again. Digging through her bag, Mrs. Giamatti pulled out photographs of her husband, two daughters, and four grandchildren. Еще она захватила снимок — он был у нее единственным, — на котором Trixie была запечатлена вместе со всей семьей. They took pictures when the family last got together.

Mrs. Giamatti tried to control herself.

- I пережила не одни похороны и не собираюсь распускаться.

Not on people. Not at a veterinary clinic.

“Dr. King said the time had come. Dr. King, a respected local veterinarian, nodded grimly. She said that the dog's kidney failure was progressing, and besides, she would soon die of cancer anyway. King believed that truly loving owners understand that sometimes the decision to euthanize is necessary. She treated them with respect and tried to act promptly, without further ado.

Миссис Джиаматти поставила фотографию на край смотрового стола, чтобы Trixie могла видеть людей, которые ее любили.

The dog, lying almost unconscious, crawled closer to the old woman, licked her hand and closed her eyes. Доктор Кинг спросила, не хочет ли миссис Джиаматти побыть минутку наедине с Trixie. Heа отказалась, но поднесла к губам распятие и положила ладонь на голову Trixie. Dr. King administered an anesthetic, and then, a few minutes later, gave the second injection, which immediately stopped the dog's heart.

Everything happened in a matter of minutes. Trixie лежала неподвижно и, приложив к ее груди стетоскоп, д-р Кинг покачала головой. Everything was over.

She expressed her condolences to Mrs. Giamatti and, patting her hand, left the office. Mrs. Giamatti had tears in her eyes. She asked that the dog be cremated and the ashes given to her, although she had no idea what she would do with the urn. When she gets home, she will call Maria and Tina and let them know what happened. Or maybe call them tomorrow. Angela Giamatti looked tired.

Heа собрала фотографии, сложила их в сумку и обернулась к Trixie, застывшей на смотровом столе.

“Goodbye, girl,” she said and left the office.

Mrs. Giamatti forgot to pay for the procedure, but Dr. King whispered to the assistant not to worry about it.

I escorted Angela to the Church of Our Lady—she didn't say a word along the way—and waited outside while she talked to Father Joseph. He went out with her,